Posted by Xenni on January 26, 2001 at 17:39:10:
In Reply to: Re: Does a Non-Greek Girl Have a Chance?! posted by Tracey on January 25, 2001 at 12:41:59:
Thanks, Tracey, for your candor.
I am 38 years old, so I've been in a few relationships, and agree that it's the "subtle disapproval" of his guilty conscience (and mother) that sucks the air out of my balloon. My gorgeous man is 37 years old and doesn't seem to "get" what that does to the outsider's/xenni's head....he is SO engaged in his community (who is his REAL girlfriend- try competing with that!) and pretty much has admitted to me that I am the "trophy blonde" to impress his Greek male friends and get back at ex-girlfriends when they hear that he's hanging out with a non-Greek blonde. Look, if you give me the title of "trophy" then I'd better get the jewelry that goes with it (semi-joke)...alas, I am beginning to think that that will never happen because the approval of his community is SO important to him; his life absolutely revolves around it.
Despite the (major)pain that the Greek women he has been involved with have brought him, they still win "on paper" and despite my unconditional love and support for him, I'm still not the "right choice" and that really kills me.
I truly thought that when I stopped dating Jewish guys that I'd never experience the "Never Enough Club" again because it was so frustrating (being the disapproved of "shiksa")..little did it occur to me that the MORE you love someone, the harder it is to accept that you simply don't, and maybe never will, fit into this person's life.
It's sad and unfair and I wish and pray that somehow, we can find a happy medium. At this point, I am nothing but frustrated and continue to pray for patience and acceptance of this situation.
I really appreciate your honesty and perhaps it was just what I needed to read at this moment.
There are no accidents.
Thanks again.